When was the last time you reflected on your own journey in your journal? And I don’t mean obsessed about where you are going next, but instead took a close look at where you are right now?
I have a six-month-old grandson, Oliver, and to say that I’m obsessed with every inch of him would not be an exaggeration. His big blue eyes, the way his little fingers curl around mine, and, for some reason, those tiny, perfect feet – I adore them! Squishy, pink and full of potential. I can’t help but think about where those little feet will take him. How soon will he take his first steps? How fast will he walk, then run? Will he dance, chase after a soccer ball, travel the world?
Right now, Ollie is content right where he is, snuggling on my lap, devouring his bottle. He’s unaware of all that awaits him and he isn’t in a hurry. He isn’t worried about milestones or whether he’s “on track.” He is simply here, moving forward in the smallest, most joyful way possible. I wish I could say the same for myself.
So often, when I’m planning my own next steps, I can get too far ahead of myself. Every January, I fill my calendar with goals and intentions, neatly plotted from start to finish. Then I set about the task of getting from point A to B as quickly as possible, as if the completion of a goal is the only thing that matters. I’ll be happy when I get there, I think. But what about the small, seemingly insignificant steps in between? The daily effort, the slow but steady momentum that actually makes progress possible? The messy middle, where nothing is certain but everything is possible?
We love to celebrate achievements but we gloss over the daily discipline required to get there, not to mention the mini-victories that happen all along the way. I watch Oliver as he practices rolling over. He grunts, wiggles and cries with a bit a frustration. But he doesn’t stop. He keeps trying, his tiny muscles getting stronger with each attempt. He isn’t thinking about failure or looking silly. He’s simply taking one step- one baby step – towards his next big moment.
I think about how often I give up when things feel slow or difficult. We live in a culture that loves quick fixes and seeks proficiency in “five easy steps.” How often do I rush through the uncomfortable, unskilled process of growth instead of trusting and allowing it? Ollie doesn’t know it yet, but he is teaching me a valuable lesson: real progress happens in small, unglamorous moments. It happens when we show up, even when we don’t feel like it. It happens when we take another step, even when we’re tired. It happens when we keep moving, even when we’re unsure of where the road will lead.
For now, Oliver’s journey is just beginning, and I get the joy of watching it unfold- one wiggle, one reach, one determined little kick at a time. Maybe, I’ll learn to embrace my own journey the same way. The future will be here soon enough. Until then, I’ll take a deep breath, take one, small step forward, and enjoy being right here where I need to be.
Ellen Bell a certified Mindfulness Meditation Teacher with a specialty in the practice of positive journaling for wellness. Find out more about Ellen.